Wednesday, January 29, 2014

Addiction?

I have been working on a theory lately that it is nearly impossible to change. I think for one to change it really has to be an evolution. It has to be a unfaltering decision that effects the conscience and sub-coinscience. An addictive personality/behavior type will never be cured by just taking away the stimuli. I don't know of any type of treatment options that are truly effective. What I have seen over the years is that the individual exhibiting this behavior when the stimuli is taken away the individual eventually turns to a new addiction.

Some examples I have seen:

Alcohol addiction - Porn Addiction
Alcohol addiction - Food Addiction
Cigarette Addiction - Food Addiction
Food Addiction - Addiction to Exercise

In most cases the underlying cause of this destructive behavior is never treated.

The reason I am even talking about this is because of everything that is going on with myself. When I was a child my mother used to get on me about my weight all of the time. She used to call me fat and that I will end up looking like a obese cousin of mine.  In turn, I used to sneak food and go in my room. I would find so much pleasure in eating. I was trying to get back at her even though it was manifesting into a relationship with food I have not been able to conquer.

Rationalizing, I would come to conclusion that my food addiction feeds into my addictive personality type which in turn is fueled by my emotional angst.   I need to retrain my thought process when it comes to food and emotion based eating.  I am not sure exactly how to go about this.  I know where it stems from. I can trace my past but when do you just let go of the past and move forward from it.

Change has to be an evolution of mind and can not happen over night.